Sunday, October 27, 2013

The Long, Dark Teatime...wait! That's been done.

Heigh-ho, friends and/or neighbors!  I'm your (mostly) friendly neighborhood atheist.  Yes, we do exist!  We might be your next-door neighbors or the people upstairs or down your block or *gasp!* possibly even in your own household!  Eek!  No worries and kindly put down the phone--I promise you that exterminators will not spray, dust or remove atheists.  We're part of the natural environment.

As an atheist, I've read the Bible any number of times.  In fact, reading the Bible at the tender age of twelve caused me to become an atheist in the first place.  My past aside, the Bible is very, very bad at history, geography, medicine and any number of other things.  What it's good at is provoking questions.  Nagging questions.  Questions that buzz around like so many annoying little fruit flies demanding attention.  Or a damned good swatting.

It's because of those questions that I've issued a standing invitation--the God known most often in this country (the U.S.) as "God" is more than welcome to join me for tea.  I've issued a standing invitation that God (or his son, Jesus, or the Holy Ghost, whatever that may be) are welcome to join me any day between the hours of, say, 2 pm and 4 pm for tea.  I even have a fairly wide variety of teas to choose from and there's usually some cookies or cake laying about the place to make it cozy and a proper tea.  He is more than welcome to RSVP as "God" or "Jesus" or "Holy Ghost" or "El" or "Elohim" or "Jehovah" or "Yahweh" or whatever alias he happens to be using this week.  I'm not particularly fussy and I'm pretty good at improvising when extra guests show up, so if he has a hankering to be accompanied by any of his other triune parts, they are more than welcome.

I plan on using this blog to explore the many, many questions I have for him.  I'll try not to be accusatory--no sense being rude to a guest--but that'll be a bit difficult at times (the whole "Jephthah Incident" springs to mind).   Most of my questions will be based on the ever-popular KJV of the Bible. I may take a dip into some the other 4 billion versions just to see where they diverge on specific points, but, for the most part, the KJV will be it.

So, allow me to grab the teapot, settle in, help yourself to cookies and we'll see if he/they/them? show up with any answers, shall we?